I refuse to learn what Malcolm Butler has been up to.

This has taken a conscious effort on my part. Within 12 hours of the Seahawks winning their way to the Super Bowl this past Sunday, I saw the first story on the Patriots player who broke Seattle’s heart 11 years ago.

I did not click the link.

I will not click the link.

If you do not recognize the name, Butler is the cornerback who figured prominently in Seattle’s last Super Bowl appearance in the same way that John Wilkes Booth figured prominently in the end of Abraham Lincoln’s presidential term.

And now, because the Seahawks will be facing New England when they return to the Super Bowl for the first time since that loss 11 years ago, Butler’s name is being brought up again, and I am putting my hands firmly over my ears and saying “la-la-la-la-la.”

I have no interest in reading about what Butler did that day, nor what he has done since. I do not want to revisit the logistics of Russell Wilson’s second-down pass that he intercepted.

If you ask me whether the Seahawks should have handed the ball to Marshawn Lynch when they had it at New England’s 1-yard line, I will grit my teeth and say, “Yes. They should have done anything other than what they did.”

Then I will go find a pillow and scream so I don’t have to discuss it any further.

Because that moment has absolutely nothing to do with this one. Each team has a different coach. None of the players remain. While I’m never going to be able to forget that particular sequence of events, I refuse to relive it now.

So instead of reliving Seattle’s most agonizing defeat, I’m going to relish the things that have made this the single biggest surprise in our city’s sports history.

The coach

OK, we all remember Pete Carroll. We all love Pete Carroll. He was Willy Wonka in a pair of khakis. He’s gone, though. The Seahawks fired him after the 2023 season, though we like to say “moved on from” because it sounds more polite.

The guy who replaced him, Mike Macdonald, is not quite so excitable. He looks more like an accountant. In fact, he had a job offer from KPMG, the financial firm, in 2014 when he was wrapping up his time as a graduate assistant at the University of Georgia, his alma mater. He took an NFL internship with the Ravens instead.

The Seahawks job is Macdonald’s first head-coaching role at any level, and in his second season, he has them playing for a championship. It turns out he’s something of a stone-cold killer in a headset. While he has a wry sense of humor, he’s also got a dead-eyed stare that calls to mind Quint’s description of a great white in Jaws.

“You know the thing about a shark?

“He’s got lifeless eyes. Black eyes. Like a doll’s eyes.

“When he’s coming at you, he doesn’t seem to be living. ‘Til he bites you.”

Macdonald is 38 years old. If the Seahawks win the Super Bowl, he will become the third-youngest coach to win a title in league history.

Something football-y you can say: The beauty of Pete Carroll’s defense was its simplicity, but with Mike Macdonald, you never know where the pressure is going to come from. Absolute nightmare for opposing offenses.

The quarterback

Sam Darnold is only 28 years old, but he’s already been written off by the NFL. A couple of times, in fact. The Jets chose him with the third pick of the 2018 draft, but gave up on him after just three years. He won 14 games with the Vikings last year, but Minnesota let him walk after a poor playoff performance against the Rams.

He signed with the Seahawks, and while he’s had a tendency to commit turnovers during the regular season, he is also coming off the best game of his career. He threw for 345 yards and three touchdowns against the Rams.

He’s got a super fun nickname: Ginger Cuz. This was bestowed upon him by no less an authority than Marshawn Lynch.

Something football-y you can say after any big play he makes: “They said he couldn’t win the big game! They said he couldn’t win the big game!” This was the knock on Darnold coming into this season.

The sweetest mauler in America

It is hard to imagine overlooking anyone who is 6 feet 5, 310 pounds, let alone someone as fast and powerful as Seattle defensive tackle Leonard Williams.

He’s nicknamed Big Cat and called Leo by his family and friends. He is a defensive tackle, which is the football equivalent of working in the boiler room. He gets pushed by at least two 300-pound offensive linemen on every play.

The Seahawks traded for him in 2023, and after being named to the Pro Bowl just once in his first nine seasons, Williams is finally getting the recognition he deserves. He has 18 sacks over the past two seasons and is headed to the Pro Bowl for a second consecutive season.

Also: He has the best, most wholesome house-plant content on TikTok. I’m serious. Big Cat loves his plants. Also, watching him celebrate Sunday’s win over the Rams by doing snow angels in the confetti alongside his wife, Hailey, who is expecting, is about the sweetest thing you’ll ever see.

Something football-y you can say: That dude is faster than anyone who’s stronger than him, and stronger than anyone who’s faster than him. Absolute game-wrecker.

The Madison Avenue man

Jaxon Smith-Njigba is pretty.

This is not an adjective that gets hung on a lot of football players, but this is a man so smooth he will occasionally refer to himself using his initials: JSN.

He finished with 1,793 yards receiving, the largest single-season total in franchise history. He also became the first Seahawk in 40 years to lead the NFL in receiving. Not bad considering that when the season started, one of the biggest questions was whether he could handle being the team’s top receiver after the trade of D.K. Metcalf.

Not only can he handle it, he’s going to look absolutely great while he does it.

Something football-y you can say: That man is like 7-Eleven. Always open. It doesn’t matter where you line him up. It doesn’t matter who you put on him. He’s just so freaking smooth.

As for the Patriots? They’ve got a really good quarterback in Drake Maye, a very smart coach in Mike Vrabel, and they also played what was the easiest schedule in the league by a significant margin.

I should hedge that a little by saying anything can happen, because it can, but I do not believe this game will be particularly close. I think the Seahawks are going to win in fairly decisive fashion.

But even if this happens, it will not make up for what occurred the last time the Seahawks faced the Patriots in the Super Bowl. It may, however, reduce the number of times that game is brought up in the future, which would be great, because I’d really prefer to stop revisiting it.

Something football-y you can say: Let’s appreciate this Seahawks team for who they are, as opposed to thinking about what they were the last time they got this far in the playoffs.